Why do we comfort eat, and how can you stop?

Most of us have reached for a biscuit after a difficult day or eaten more than we needed because we were bored, upset or tired. That is comfort eating, and it is extremely common. A Cambridge University Hospitals patient resource on emotional eating notes that most people eat in response to their emotions to some extent.

Comfort eating becomes a problem when food is your main way of coping with difficult feelings, or when the habit starts to affect your weight, your health or how you feel about yourself. Understanding why it happens is the first step towards changing it.

What comfort eating feels like

Comfort eating is not the same as ordinary hunger. The HelpGuide describes a useful distinction between emotional hunger and physical hunger that many people find helpful:

• Emotional hunger comes on suddenly. One minute you are fine; the next, you feel an urgent need for something specific, often something sweet, salty or rich. Physical hunger builds gradually.
• Emotional hunger craves particular foods. You want chocolate, crisps or toast with butter. Physical hunger is more flexible: a proper meal would do.
• Emotional hunger is not satisfied by fullness. You may keep eating past the point of comfort. With physical hunger, you tend to stop when you have had enough.
• Emotional hunger often leaves guilt behind. If you feel bad about what or how much you ate, the eating was probably driven by emotion rather than need.

None of this means you are weak or greedy. It means food is doing a job that something else should be doing, and that pattern can be changed.

Why we comfort eat

There is no single reason. Comfort eating usually sits at the intersection of biology, habit and emotion.

Stress and cortisol

When you are under short-term stress, your body releases adrenaline, which can actually suppress appetite. But when stress is ongoing, something different happens. Harvard Health explains that the adrenal glands release cortisol, the body’s main stress hormone, which increases appetite and may raise motivation to eat. High cortisol combined with high insulin drives cravings for high-fat, high-sugar foods in particular.

A Finnish study of over 5,000 people, cited by Harvard Health, found that stress-related eating was linked to obesity in women. British researchers found that people with a stronger cortisol response to stress were more likely to snack afterwards than those with a lower response.

Emotions you are not processing

Sadness, loneliness, boredom, anxiety, frustration and even happiness can trigger comfort eating. The Mayo Clinic lists relationship conflicts, work pressure, fatigue, money worries and health concerns among the most common emotional triggers. Boredom and positive emotions can also lead to overeating: it is not always about feeling bad.

Childhood habits

Many of us grew up in households where food was a reward, a comfort or a way to show love. If you were given a treat when you fell over or a sweet when you were upset, your brain may have learned early on to associate food with emotional relief. The Cambridge University Hospitals resource notes that society reinforces this pattern: we offer tea and biscuits to someone who is upset, we celebrate with cake, we bond over meals.

Restrictive dieting

Strict food rules can make comfort eating worse, not better. The Houston Methodist dietitian’s guide points out that restrictive approaches fail because they assume the problem is willpower. It is not. Comfort eating is an emotional problem and needs an emotional solution. Harsh dieting simply adds shame and guilt to the mix, which are themselves triggers for more comfort eating.

What actually helps

There is no instant fix, but several practical strategies have genuine support from clinical experience and, in some cases, research.

Pause before you eat

When a craving hits, wait five minutes before acting on it. HelpGuide recommends using that pause to ask yourself: am I physically hungry, or am I feeling something? Even a short delay can break the automatic reach for food. You do not have to get this right every time. The point is to interrupt the habit loop, not to be perfect.

Keep a food and mood diary

The Mayo Clinic suggests writing down what you eat, how much, and how you were feeling at the time. Over a week or two, patterns often become obvious: you always eat after a difficult call with a family member, or you reach for crisps every evening at nine. Once you see the pattern, you can plan around it.

Find non-food ways to manage the feeling

This is the core of the Houston Methodist approach: match the coping strategy to the emotion, rather than using food for everything.

• Stressed? Try a short walk, deep breathing, or ten minutes of stretching. Harvard Health notes that low-intensity exercise reduces cortisol levels.
• Lonely or sad? Call or message someone. Even a brief conversation can shift the feeling.
• Bored? Find something absorbing that uses your hands or your attention: a podcast, a crossword, gardening, tidying a drawer.
• Tired? Rest is what you need, not food. A warm bath, a cup of herbal tea or an early night may help more than a snack.

Do not skip meals or restrict too hard

The Mayo Clinic warns against extreme dietary restriction: it makes you more vulnerable to cravings and more likely to overeat when you do. Regular, balanced meals keep blood sugar stable and reduce the biological drive to eat impulsively.

Practise mindful eating

Mindful eating means slowing down and paying attention to what you are eating: the taste, the texture, the smell, how full you feel. A systematic review by Katterman et al. (2014), published in Eating Behaviors, examined 14 studies on mindfulness-based approaches for binge eating and emotional eating. It found some evidence of reduced binge eating and emotional eating in participants who practised mindfulness, although the authors noted that the evidence base was still small and more research was needed.

In practical terms, mindful eating does not require a course or a therapist. Putting your fork down between mouthfuls, eating at a table rather than in front of a screen, and checking in with your hunger halfway through a meal are all simple starting points.

About flower remedies

In the Bach flower remedy tradition, several remedies are associated with emotional patterns linked to comfort eating. Cherry Plum is traditionally used for feelings of losing control, Crab Apple for self-criticism and body image concerns, and Agrimony for hiding distress behind a cheerful exterior. These are part of a system of 38 remedies developed by Dr Edward Bach in the 1930s.

Flower remedies remain widely used as a traditional, self-care practice. However, the clinical evidence does not support claims of specific therapeutic effects. A systematic review by Ernst (2010), published in BMC Complementary and Alternative Medicine, examined all available randomised controlled trials and concluded that the most reliable studies found no difference between flower remedies and placebo.

If you find flower remedies helpful as part of a broader self-care routine, there is no evidence they cause harm. But they should not replace the practical strategies above, and they are not a substitute for professional support if comfort eating is affecting your health.

When to get support

Comfort eating sits on a spectrum. At one end, it is an occasional and harmless habit. At the other, it can shade into binge eating disorder, a recognised condition that needs professional help. Your GP can talk through what you are experiencing and, if appropriate, refer you for cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), which has good evidence for helping people change unhelpful eating patterns.

If you need support now:

• Your GP is always a good first step.
• NHS 111 (call 111 or go online) can direct you to local mental health support.
• Beat (the UK’s eating disorder charity): call their helpline on 0808 801 0677, open 365 days a year. Visit beateatingdisorders.org.uk.
• Samaritans: call 116 123, free, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Visit samaritans.org.
• In an emergency, call 999.

Common questions about comfort eating

Natural World Team

Independent guides to natural remedies and supplements, checked against NHS and EFSA references.